V-day : amidst the hoopla and the excitement!

With the end of valentine’s week on Sunday and all the hoopla between singles, not so singles and people in relationship, social media was full of different kind of views regarding this day. There is always a sense of little jealousy and pity that goes amidst singles and the committed people…specially girls. While most of the girls go gaga over the occasion, some secretly wishes to be single and date numerous guys without any tag. While on the other hand, the single ones try to show how cool they are to be not dating anyone but wishes to have bouquets and gifts rolled in red gift papers.

I have been through all of three phases in the last three-four years during valentine’s day. You know being single, not so single and committed phase. And to my surprise, like all other girls…my though process has been different, every time. But one thing that I did all these years was to wish myself a valentine’s day first.

Out of all my girlfriends, most of them are married, one is single (kinda dating) and I am engaged and all of them had different views. When I was really excited for the day and the surprises my fiancé had planned for, one of my married girlfriend was feeling all low and it was just like another day for her. To her side of the story, life changes drastically after marriage and things get complicated. She misses being single..the uncertainty of not knowing with whom she is going to spend the V-day with. No, I am not saying it’s same for all married couples, coz other of my married girlfriends were all decked up with red lipstick on and all ready to hit the dance floor.

I wonder, what is it that change our mindsets when we are in a particular phase. The fear of not having loved at all…or the monotony of having just one person for the rest of your life? The excitement of being pampered so much or the feeling of being free and not answerable to anyone? Or do we just hide what we actually feel?

Phases and Batches!

I believe that life comes in phases and that people are divided in batches. So, you know you have Phase 1, Phase 2 and so on. And then there are batches like Batch 1, Batch 2 and so on. Most of batches pass through most of the phases. It is like a matrix. What I am living today…someone might live it three years from now. Some batches stay in one phase all their life. And then there are batches who pass each and every phase. People like us…intense..melancholic…always looking out for something.

I have known a lot of people. People from the virtual world…from real world…and people from virtual world to real world. And I have known people who have refused to grow up with time. I met people like me…people hard to understand…hard to satisfied…yet finding happiness in small things.

So I would like to call such people ‘we’, coz I feel we all are same in some way. We believe that having a relationship is healthy and fulfilling but we should always have our own time to read a book…sip a coffee or just roaming around. We also believe that there exist a whole lot of gap between being friends and being in a relationship…and we call them ‘unnamed’ or ‘untagged’ relationship. We all have had one. And we all understand why. We understand that there is a life beyond shopping and gossiping. And we know that love and soulmate could be two different persons. We learn letting go of things early than any other batch and no matter how hard it is…we learn to follow path of empathy.

We might seem disconnected from the world…but we are happy the way we are..or atleast when we are not….we do not fake it! This is to all the ‘We’ I have known….

Bookmarks!

I have this habit of bookmark-ing things. Specially places I would like to visit someday. Right from a loud café in Delhi to a peaceful location somewhere in the hills. Resorts or lavish hotels or be it just a road side vendor selling awesome food. I might not be able to visit them anytime in future, but I imagine what it will be like to be there. I have with fascination with places. More than people I am fascinated with places. I don’t remember a single face on the streets of Melbourne but I remember the locks which was there on the bridge hanging with some messages. I remember the shape and color of bricks used beside the dock.

I guess I have the habit of bookmark-ing life as well. Not the people…but the events. I don’t quite remember the people I met when I was a kid, but I definitely remember the places. The big trees and the lake beside my bua’s house….the buildings and the roundabouts I used to cross while going to market with my grandmother.

I remember what you said to me at 2 am in the morning while we both were drunk, our fingers trembling while we were spilling our secrets. You might not remember …but I remember even the emoticons you used. That’s the kind of person I am. Coz I bookmarked that moment in my mind.

There are thousands and thousands of bookmarked moments saved in my mind forever. And there are hundreds of bookmarks on my laptop. I love each of them…good or bad. While I’d like to see the bookmarks on my laptop once in my life….I wish I could visit some of the bookmarks in my mind once!

Clueless!

I guess I have lost it. The passion and the zeal to do something or anything new. I feel I live a robotic life. Waking up at 7:15, making breakfast, getting ready for office, packing lunch, having breakfast ..working and working with no proper goal. Coming back….putting things at their place…clothes, slippers, bag, specs, earphones. Changing clothes. Serving dinner..slicing beetroot, serving curd,dal and 1.5 chapati. Eating dinner while watching friends. Talk sometime on phone and sleep.

Every single day…I repeat the same thing…the same schedule. Fuck! I earn decent….I wear decent clothes. Eat at good places during weekend. Shop. But what is it that is missing. I don’t know. Everything is pretty good. Maybe I am bored. But I am bored everywhere. Even when on holidays. When I go out for a movie. When I shop. Everything seem a task for me. EVERY DAMN THING! Even having food. I just want to lie down and do nothing. Just nothing! You know in my pajamas! Not caring about my weight or about the pimples on my face..the dark circles..or any fucking damn thing.

I don’t talk to anyone. Any of my friend I mean. I talk to my parents and him. That’s it! Is that could be the reason of my monotony? Maybe!

Maybe I am just tired of living here. It’s been 4.5 years since I have been living away from home. But after some point of time, I get bored at home too. But atleast I am not bothered about what to get cook in breakfast lunch and dinner. About the cleanliness of my house.

At times I feel like taking a sabbatical. But then “Planning” you know. “Planning” the next year doesn’t let me take the leaves.

I have no clue what to do to break the monotony. Suggest me some please?

Coz her heart is the foundation of your healthy home!

I was in my MBA 1st year. My father used to call me every night, even if there is nothing important to talk about. I was having my midterms exam and one night, I did not receive any call from him. I thought he might have skipped due to my exams. He would call next day.

Whole day went by but I did not receive his call the next day as well. I was too busy with my preps that I thought he would call. When even by 10 p.m that day I did not get his call, I called him. My mom picked up. She was not her usual self. After much investigation, I found out my father got a major heart attack. His cholesterol level was too high and there were other complications too. He was transferred to the one of the best hospital in Gurgaon where his open heart surgery took place.

Those 21 days were the worst days of my life. I still could not forget his pain. Later on, my mother reports too started showing high level of cholesterol. Due to all this oily food, there was a lot of increment in her weight and thus, increasing the level of cholesterol.

My dad after his heart attack took it really serious and stopped consuming any oily food. Even his normal food was now cooked in #Saffola. He started his morning walk and exercise giving it a total of 60 mins from his day. Remembering his pain and the increased level of cholesterol in mom’s report, he took the responsibility to take precaution rather than cure. My mother is little lazy when it comes to any form of workout. Even walk. My dad took the pledge to #ProtectHerHeart and did all he could.

He made it a point to wake mom up. He would not leave until unless mom is up from the bed. By the time mom put her shoes on, he take jug of water and they both gulp them down. And then they hit the road. Dad, since was walking from quite sometime now, has developed the stamina. Nevertheless, he would stop whenever he feels mom is tired, take a halt and then start walking again. He started from 20 mins ..exceeding 2 mins every week. Now both mom and dad walk min of 30 mins daily..sometimes exceeding 60 mins. His dedication and mom’s commitment did tremendous task and now both of their cholesterol level is in control. Plus they are fit (more than me)

This junk food and almost every day eating out is takin a toll on me too. My weight has increased quite in last few month, and he also has put on weight. Looking at my Mom-Dad combo, we both too have decided to walk-run-walk every morning. Since he live quite far from my place, we have decided to call each other (whoever wakes up early) in morning for motivation (Me being a non-morning person). And then we would walk-run-walk for 30 mins. Plus we will also talk a 15 mins walk after dinner every day. I hope this will protect both of our hearts! Coz good health is the ultimate asset.

“I am joining the Saffolalife #ProtectHerHeart initiative and pledging my support to better heart health in Association with BlogAdda

Design your dreams...Design your HOME!

Getting married to someone you are in love with is like a dream coming true. And planning your house is like living a fairytale. Fortunately, I am living this fairytale these days. All the excitement from choosing the color of your curtains, to furniture ..from designing your bedroom to coloring your home gets the adrenaline rush in me. But being an obsessive perfectionist I am..i need my things to be near perfection.

Me and my fiancé are both working and we do not get much time to explore things. We only have weekends where we have to decide which thing to take up first. I, again being me, do not want to compromise when it comes to designing my dream home. Amidst all these running from furniture shops to showrooms displaying thousands of curtains and cushions, the only thing running inside my mind was to choose the color of our bedroom. I want it to be a reflection of my personality and show the sophistication (which I am a fan off) at the same time.

Dearth of leaves and the overflowing work was not giving us anytime to look for color and theme of my bedroom which was there in the back of my mind since long. One day when I was browsing for some dress, I came across the app by Bedbathmore named as #PaintFinder

I was so excited to see the complete theme based color scheme. You just choose the color of our choice and boom!!! You actually could take a virtual view of how your room would look like. I just loved loved the concept.

It is just so easy to use and you can view your future house/room without even putting an iota of color. This came as such a relief for me as there would be no chances of error since I know exactly how my dream would look like.

The anxiety in me took a back seat as soon as I came across this app of #PaintFinder. I chose the color, chose the room (which has everything from your living room, bedroom to bathroom) and then order the shade card!

I always wanted my room to be bright yet not gaudy at the same time. And hence mauve or shade of light purple has always been my choice. Thanks to #PaintFinder, I was able to find exactly what I was looking for. This color is bright and subtle at the same time. Gosh! I am so relieved.

My fiancé is happy…to be in laws are happy and I am super duper happy. What else do I need? Atleast one of the major problem is solved! Phewhh!!!

“I am participating in the #PaintFinder activity in Association with BlogAdda & Bed Bath & more

Life as I see it! - I

They say learning never ends. Some say that smarter are the people who learn from other’s mistakes. I find these two statements contradicting each other. I have lost the counts of my mistakes…I learn from them and then most of the times I make the same mistake again.

I don’t know which category of people I belong to. When it comes to heart and emotions…I still am a fool.

I remember years back, a known stranger told me that I am a melancholic person. I am never going to be satisfied with what I have. And people like me should live alone. Not as a curse but as an advice. I smiled at him and said, it’s just a phase. It will pass. Today I remember his words and think how right he was.

I had an aunt. She was married at a very early stage. She was known to be a rebellion. A person very different from her family. She was, as said, was a very strong person..emotionally. It was said that no one could break her heart. As anticipated, she got divorced within two years of her marriage. Reason was, she was heartbroken. People still say that she was a strong headed woman and did not adjust with her husband. With time, as I got to know her, I came to know why she left him. She left because of her heart that was broken months after months. The abuse and arguments she had to face.

After few months of her divorce she left the country. At that time people said that it’s because she got a very good opportunity overseas. Truth is, the society never let her live here. She was tired of the comments and taunts she and her parents had to face everyday. And hence she left. It’s been years now. I am more mature to understand her situation. I don’t know where she is. The only thing I know is that she still is not married. She chose to live alone. She studied..work hard..made a life of her own and lived alone.

Today, when I think of her…I feel I am her. Like her. I feel I will end up like her. Alone. Not sad alone. But alone. Yes, people like me should live alone.