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Saturday, May 8, 2010

To the unseperable part of my being.......

I saw you last night...yeah it was you..in your usual sedate manner...smilling with the world..you seems to be happy, enjoying all colours of life...I felt happy for you seems to be satisfied with your surroundings.It was a dream though....but there's something which is disturbing me..I dont know its you or something else.Feeling chocked inside...are you still with her? Do you love her? Ahhh..I know these questions wont take anywhere. Its useless to crave for something which is not mine.Bt then I cant afford to see you with someone else. You dont talk to me now...it burns me..your avoidance.I feel like shouting and screaming...no one knows this...not even you..what phase I am going through.You dont want to come back ..isnt? I know. But I still love you. Like mad. Though your absence kills me....this pain is unbearable...but still I am addcited to it...I want to live with this pain...forever....which makes me feel you.
I dont want to sleep.It upset me.Your dreams.But what upsets me more is when I dream of you with open eyes.I dont want to cry either for I blv that my tears will take your memories away from me.I have become a victim...with no sign of improvement...for I have lost every hope of gettin better.I am getting insane..or better say have become one.Talking with you was the only thing best in my life.The only thing which made me feel alive then.Today,I am a dead soul caged in a numb body.

10 comments:

Mayz said...

its difficult livin like this but i guess all of us have adjusted to it...

now it feels impossible to live without smthn continuously prickin away at our hearts...

tk cr

Mansi said...

@Mayz
Yeah...smetym adjustment is the only solution....

heartupsurge said...

Well Mansi, I just wish to say that the soul never dies. It is the basis of our existence. The mere acceptance of the fact that you still feel the pain itself reveals the truth of the vibrant and restless soul inside the numb body. Life is not about what others make you to feel. It's about what you choose to feel.

Mansi said...

yeah .. may b pain is d thing i chose!!!!

heartupsurge said...

for the time being, yes.

THE REALIST said...

there is a saying - " This too shall pass " - learn from ur past but one shudn be stuck thr..this is my opinion.

cheers
pradeep

Mansi said...

@Realist
yeah... no one wants to struck newhr...bt den few things are nt in our control!!!

THE REALIST said...

absolutely...i think there a lot of things thats out of our control....but we still can make lot things happen :-)

Mansi said...

i wish

THE REALIST said...

one more thing... if we really can't do anything about it... its time to move onto better things. life is too short and i'll stop yapping :-)