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Saturday, February 23, 2013

She bid him the last goodbye!

You never know how your last goodbye would be like. Neither did she. But for her it has always been important. To bid the last adieu. Awkward it was…meeting after months. Not knowing what to talk..how to talk..with the one with whom she talked all night…about anything and everything. What should be asked? How is he? Knowing he’s not fine? Or maybe he was doing just fine?

Silence was the only thing that exist between the two. She had her doubts…her questions..and she was sure he had his share of doubts too. But sometimes keeping mum is the best thing you could do. Watching his eyes full of tears has always been the worst thing for her. And that day….it added up to the pain. Probably coz it’s the last time she was seeing him…last time she would be listening his voice…last time she was feeling his fragrance…last time his eyes was staring hers. Watching him sit beside her….with the pain and tears…it pinched million times per second to her heart. That was it! It was getting over. She was leaving this place…he has chose his life…she has her own path. They anyways weren’t in contact since months…then why was it so important to say the last words? Why she does not choose the easy path and go off without saying anything. It was painful. Toxic. Nostalgic. Hard. But it was important. For her. For them.

She decided not to shed a single tear. She decided not to say anything about what all happened. Why things got worse…why the decision has been taken. She decided not to tell him how much she miss him…how nobody could ever value him like she does. But he had some other plans. And she busted out. It was the last goodbye. Maybe that’s why tears didn’t stopped. Maybe that’s why she had to say those things.

He….like always…after all shouting and anger…gave his handkerchief. He always did that. To stop her from crying. And this was the last time. Yes…he said it right..she had no right to call it over…it was about two of them…it has always been about two of them. She could not take the decision alone. But he left no choice. He was in pain too…maybe because of how awkwardly things ended between them. How they never talked after that night. And maybe that’s why the last words were important. He lit his cigarette to relief the tension. The evening ended with casual bye. He is relieved now. His pain has decreased. And her job is done. After all this is what she wanted….to release him from her pain.

But…he never realized…that it was…indeed….THE LAST GOODBYE!

P.S. Why is it always so important to meet one last time before you leave….to talk the last words…to exchange the goodbyes…to see that person one last time? To save that moment for eternity? To remember years later how it ended? To FEEL the touch one last time? To end it in a good note? Why the last goodbyes are always special…always so important?

Sunday, February 3, 2013

This will fade too...oneday...someday!

The moment lived today will become a distant memory one day. Gradually and eventually everything will fade. Every memory, every tear dropped, the insanity, the insomaniac nights…the fragrance..half smiles…the smell of damp cigarettes….the lemonades after hangover…the feeling of being lost…promises…that were made to be broken…messages that lived in archive for years…mails in the red marked folder…every song sent…conversations that remained in mind and never found the courage to be spoken. The drafts that remind of dates…dates which remind of certain events…the colour of Black coffee...all will fade.

Name will become just another word. Phone numbers..just a contact. Won’t even bother to look at the ‘status’ and ‘last seen’ at watsapp. This is how it is done everytime and by everyone. This is certainly not moving on. No-one moves on..ever! EVER!

It’s neither good nor bad..it’s just the way IT IS. There will never be any answer for few questions. Why smell of a new book is so familiar? Why nail paint get off in weird shapes? Why sometimes you find solace amidst an unknown crowd? What life has in store for you? Why memories fade? There will never be an answer so absolute.

Coz the only absolute is TIME…the only thing constant is CHANGE. Nothing more…nothing less.