Tuesday, October 23, 2012

No more teachings...I have learned enough 'Dear Life'

“ I have become weak. Very weak. Emotionally, mentally…n somewhere deep down physically. “
“Or maybe…you are becoming stronger. Much stronger”
“I don’t know. This is not what I planned for. These changes were not in the list”
“But then, this is life. You can’t predict…you can’t help”
“I feel alone”
“Everyone is. And no one is. Accept it and move on.”

Conversations of this type happen daily. Sometimes between me and my mind and sometimes with my friends and family. But the question remains. Where have I headed towards? What life am I living now? What cost have I paid for falling in love again and losing it before I realized what blunder I have commit. A stage where even my parents have lost the hope to understand me. Everyday, I wake up with the broken pieces of my being and try to re-collect them. But every day I find one or the other piece missing. I don’t understand why is it such a compulsion to change? Why is it so important to fake happiness? Why is it so important to lie just to become a part of the group? Why things and people around change and give you reasons that even they don’t believe in?

Everyday…m losing trust…losing faith…or rather I have lost faith in everything around. No, I am no more disappointed…m no more sad or gloomy…m no more expecting anything out of anything. I am just amazed you know…AMAZED and I am literally smiling sarcastically while looking around. It’s a practical world you see! People are pragmatic towards life…towards career and even towards their social circle. It’s a mutual beneficial society. We no more make but select friends. We no more fall but choose to love. We no more feel but avoid feeling anything. We close our eyes and believe that the world is nothing but a black hole.

This is the world we live in today. Yes, believe me you that one day….one day even the best of person in your life would let you down…one day even your best friend would leave you for someone else…even your parents would fail to understand you…people who said would always stand by your side would ask you to find someone else. Coz this is life…it’s neither good nor bad…it’s just LIFE!

Hard to accept? You all must be feeling that I am just frustrated and depressed about my life and hence this post. Then let me make one thing clear…I am not. I am not an inch frustrated at the moment. Infact, I have never been this clear to myself. I have never seen the world this crystal clear. I have never been this honest to my soul and my mind.

I still don’t know whether I have accepted the truth, whether I am coming to the terms of it or have I become a rebel. Is there any love left within me or have I become numb? But yes…I have understand one thing…that in this ever changing world…only change is constant.

1 comment:

Jack said...


Read 2 posts. It is not said without a reason that Life is not bed of roses. Even roses also have thorns. You are not a weak girl. If you start thinking in this manner, the battle is already lost. Please pull yourself together and face what life throws at you with courage. Learn lesson from past mistakes but never lament on those. How I wish I could suggest more. If you feel comfortable do write to me.

Take care