For you.....may you rest in peace

Life and death are the two unseperable part of human life.....

A grl...very lively, jovial, cheerful, full of life....a grl who loved everyone...n everyone loved her...always ready to help anyone...Very beautiful, cute, freindly.
I dunn know her personally...never do i hv met her ...neither i talked with her ever....bt der are certain pplz who left a long lasting impression in ur heart...in your soul...and when they go away...only memories lefts....
Few mnths back i ws jst peepin into my cousin's profile...there i came across d profile of a grl.. khushbu(name changed)..i saw her scraps in his(cousin's) profile...she seems to be very jolly natured grl...dunn kw why bt i sort of liked her. I visited her profile and after reading her full profile i gt dis idea dat dis grl is really nice...her life mst b full of colours, happiness, enthusiasm...she mst b a person with positive vibes.
Next day i asked my cousin about her...he said "This grl ws jst an orkut frnd..bt nw i have met her several times...shez a vry gud frnd of mine...and is really a sweetheart." After that I sumhw came to kw few things about her. Well as far as I kw her...shez a grl ,every boy wants in life... friend, every person wants to be with....optimistic, lives for today. Well...I even smetym thought to be lyk her...really...without even meetin ot talkin wid her ever.
Well...time passed by....Today, when I opened my orkut account...I gt a scrap from my cousin...He was soundin depressed and tensed.I asked him the reason....and reason was so shocking that even while writting all this, I am feelin terrible and still nt able to believe his words. "Khushbu is no more, she died last night coz of asthma attack.".................
His words are still echoing beneath my mind and heart. How can this happen? How can god be so rude? How can he take away such peoples? Is this life?
I dunn kw why pplz says watever happens , happens for gud? I dun kw wat gud god has hide behind this?
We dont have control on few things in life...Death is one of them...

Race Of Life

"A friend in need is a frnd indeed"- a very popular phrase...repeated by my trainer during her lecture regarding personality development. What does it has to do with the personality?...I thought...does it? I remained quite , not wanted to distract her from her path which I always do.
She continues...giving various examples on life, office grapevine, rumours(how to deal with them), personal and professional relationships....the lecture lasts for about two hours...bt the question remained dere....wat it really has to do with our professional life?
After the lecture gt over, I went to her, She was expecting me ,as always, with a big smile. I asked her "We are going to be the part of this market where emotions rarely plays a role. We hardly get time to interact with people over there...will it be possible for us to remain in touch with our friends? Do this corporate world really has any place for friends, emotions, relations and all? I think once we are in the market, we can easily look over our triffle personal issues as we got to do so much of work there. Then why are you giving examples of life, friends, relations here? What is the need of even discussing things which plays almost no importance in the market?"
She asked "Do you have any sort of problem these days?" I said "Sort of, but thats not an issue,Once I'll jump in this market,i'll never bother for these things. Only I want to take my proffesional life at zenith"
She asked "Are you sure?"
Now at that point of time I was always stammering. She said "Think over it".
I came back..and for the whole day I just thought upon her one statement "Are you sure?" Wasnt M sure? why I stammered when she asked me that? I called her up and asked her that I really dont know the answer of that question. She said "Just think and you'll come to know, I want that answer from you".
I had no other option but to think, as this is my favourite task 'to think'.
I still dont know how to answer her question. But yes, I know that no matter how close or how far you are, you always need someone to be beside you. Your friend, your parents, your partner...anyone..anyone. There comes a time when we just run after our dreams like mad. We dunn even bother to see who all were walkin with us when we just started. We just run.. after all we have to fulfill so many dreams of ours.We never see peoples who helped us to stand up again wen we fall, we dont see those who were there with us when we were nothin...just standing in a queue, waiting for our chance to run. We never look at those who cheered for us when we were running. We just run...and finally reach at our destination. Happy, jovial, feelin like a king...and then we look back...for our friends, loved ones....But.....no one is there...not even miles away....where are they?...well, we left them far behind...behind when we were running..madly, aggresively...to accomplish our goal, not caring for anyone...just thinking about ourselves....and then ...we're left with nothing...nothing to cherish, to feel happy....we have lost everything in this race of life.
I havent answered her yet...coz i kw..she was right. No matter how much successful and content you are...these peoples, relations, who were with you in you downs are really the relations worth keeping when you are at your ups. Some relations are just unmeasurable. We'll meet ample of peoples when we go up in our professional life.........Bt we'll never be able to find such relations, such friends, such peoples ever in our life again.
We just tend to forget peoples when we step up the ladder....and thats the time when we actually know ourself what sort of person we are? Can we just let go anyone who was with us when we were nothing for the sake of our career? Can we forget all the things which he did for us when we needed him the most? Can we ever be able to forgive ourself to actually break the trust and relation with that person?
The answer is upto our conscience. Some peolpes still values relations and some still thinks they can do anything if they are professionally strong. They think that relations can be made if you have power,everything in life can wait or can keep on hold....But sumthings never come back, NEVER!!!!!!!!

Search For Happiness...

"Bagiya bagiya balak bhage, titli phir bhi haath na lage,
Is pagle ko kaun bataye, dhoond raha hai jo tu jag mein,
Koi jo paye to mann me hi paye"

I have been searching for happiness.....all in the world....i found nothin....someone told me dat happiness is in making others happy...i made others happy ,bt still my search didnt end...anotherone said dat happiness is a matter of love...love sum1 n u'll feel happy..i did dat also.....n all i got is sadness n pain... my search, still continues..Others said to wait for it, i waited soooo long...bt it nvr came to me...Not knowing wat to do..i sat in peace n ask my heart dat wat is d matter? Why after doing so many things, m still alone and unhappy? Why i always chase for happiness n gt nuthin...my heart said silently...."D day wen u start to live widout any expectations, D day wen u start living for me(my heart), D day wen u start understanding the meaning of life, D day wen u start living for urself.....U'll get wat all u want.Expectations hurts, Company of others makes u lonely, N past gives u pain....So start living for urself, live for 2day, U r d one who cn make urself happy......" N den i found dat he ws rgt......My heart whom i have been ignoring for so long, is d reason y m alive...after giving so much pain n chaos to it, it still beats for me....supports me, trust me, undertsands me.

(Dedicated to my best pal....hope ur search will end soon......)

Touching Desires With Silence

If today would my last day to live,
I wud fulfill all my desires,
A day without any pain, A day with complete bliss,
A Day when I have everyone, and thers's no one to miss,
A day when everyone loves me
A day without any agony,
A day with my loved ones,
A day with siblings and mum,
A day without any Tear
A day without any fear,
A day when I laugh out loud,
A day when I'll happily shout,
A day spend with my best pals,
remembering all those memories left so far,
A day when heart overflowing with love,far away from all hatred and pain around,
A day when again I live my life and feel beautiful things surround,
A day just different from today,
A day full of colours and away from hey,
But,this day is not my last day to live,and so I'am touching desires with silences,
Hopin one day i'll again live, I'll again laugh and become wat I really am....