This is why familiarity is bliss at times. You do not need to go those extra miles to make someone understand that this is not who you are. The person they see is not the one who lives inside your soul. This is why sometimes getting close or getting to know to new people after a certain point of time is hard.
When we were in teens or early age of being in college…meeting new people…making friends…all this seems nothing but as natural as being at home wearing sweatpants….lying on the sofa…eating chips. But as we grow old…we make believes…and principles….about ourselves…about the kind of person we become by then. And we become so stiff and stubborn with our behavior that flexibility takes a back seat.
And then…if we meet people…we show them the face which is the result of years long learning…lessons…heartbreaks. We become the reflection of the people we met in past. We do not try to reveal the real us to the people we meet later. Somewhere scared of getting hurt…of being taken for granted. At those moments of feeling low….or alone…instead of turning to a friend or calling our parents….we tend to deal with our mess ourselves. Yes, this is the kind of ego we develop with time.
So what if the person you just met couldn’t understand you. You never expected that. Coz in real….you doesn’t understand yourself at times…and surprise…or rather shock yourself with the kind of reaction you give or the behavior you possess. So what if the people around think you are as cold as a fish and have no warmth and affection for anyone..this is what you are showing them. So what if people think you are crazy and weird and behave like a psycho at times….they have no idea of the loving and sane person that is crying to get out of this cage.
How does it matter…..how? What people think or how they think? How on the earth could their opinion hurt you? Do they have that power? Are you concerned?
But what if….what if somewhere they start to become someone from no-one. What if you want them to understand you and hold you? What if you want them to not judge you and to accept you as whom you are? Do you have the choice? Do you have the right? Do you know where you are and where your life is?