I waited for your call yesterday...and at 5 pm I lost the hope to get any message from you about your arrival...There was something wrong going between us from the last few days...though I know things already are messed up but I was sure you cannot go from here without meeting me. But ,you know,there is a rebel inside my body which was continuously saying some is going wrong...and till the evening I was convinced by my brain that this time the story is different... that this tome you don’t want to meet...that I lost a little place which I had in your life.
But, 12:30 am...getting you call gave me a sigh of relief...even your "normal" talks was not disturbing me this time...for this gave me a sense that still there is something between us..not friendship..not love...but something which could not be given any name.
I did not sleep whole night...the thought of meeting you...having you with me even for few hours was making me anxious and excited at the same time. Don’t know when the time passed..yes..whole night passed without a drop of sleep in my eyes.
And within few hours..you were there..sitting in front of me..smilling...making all those cute faces...Did I ever told you I love the way you express your thoughts with your eyes? The way with each passing sentence, the expressions of your eyes changes? I could not believe my eyes we were sitting together...after more than a year...that was a moment so beautiful...and let me tell you...you have not changed a bit...you still do all those stupid things which makes me fall in love with you all over again...you still talk like a Man...a Man I wanted to be mine...you still tease me the way you used to....the way you flirt in between all those serious talks...your mere touch still evokes that desire to be in your arms...
I tried a lot to avoid any eye contact with you and concentrate on my cappuccino..but how can I avoid your voice? How can I avoid your smell which still drives me crazy? I love the way you still dominates me with an authority..that makes me feel special...even if I am not.
But why did you said that you met her before coming here? Why 24hrs for her and 3 for me? That disturbed me...a lot. I could not say this thing to you...but that made me feel bad...I don’t know why! Though at this point of time I don’t have any right to question any of your deed...but you should not have told me this. I would rather like to be ignorant and happy than to be aware and hurt. You know I never liked your closeness with her...neither when we were together nor today.
But then, the day was beautiful with you...for neither we discussed anything about future...nor complained anything about past..we lived the moment of present.
Things could never be sorted out between us...I know...but these few moments once in a year makes me feel alive for few hours.