There is void all around. Nothing seems to make any meaning. No reasons, No justifications can make me breathe like before..make me feel like before. Maybe the words have lost their value or maybe I have lost something very important deep inside. Feels as if I laugh vague…I smile vague. I feel incomplete…empty inside.
Maybe this was the phase I was scared of. This was the emptiness I was running from. Till yesterday, I had atleast one assurance that no matter what happens..you will always be beside me…like you always had. But this one month was more of a self-hatred period for me. Coz apart from the world..it was you whom I have always believed and still do..but that little thing in my heart has lost..that little love and trust…I don’t know where it has gone. We are not lovers…we can never be…we don’t have any future together..it could never be…but the place you have is so special that no one can ever take it.
I don’t know whether things will ever become same….I don’t know if I would ever be able to share things like before or you could do the same for that matter. Coz the boundaries has been raised..coz the distances has been made…the same love is there..but the bond is lost. I may talk to you..smile at you…look into your eyes…but I know that little thing in my heart is lost.
I pray every night to not make me that cold-blooded person for you as I am for the whole world around…coz only your words could keep me warm…coz only your eyes could make my eye blink…coz only you could make me and my heart weep…but things have changed…for good or for bad I don’t know…the only thing I know is that the little thing in my heart is lost!
Maybe this was the phase I was scared of. This was the emptiness I was running from. Till yesterday, I had atleast one assurance that no matter what happens..you will always be beside me…like you always had. But this one month was more of a self-hatred period for me. Coz apart from the world..it was you whom I have always believed and still do..but that little thing in my heart has lost..that little love and trust…I don’t know where it has gone. We are not lovers…we can never be…we don’t have any future together..it could never be…but the place you have is so special that no one can ever take it.
I don’t know whether things will ever become same….I don’t know if I would ever be able to share things like before or you could do the same for that matter. Coz the boundaries has been raised..coz the distances has been made…the same love is there..but the bond is lost. I may talk to you..smile at you…look into your eyes…but I know that little thing in my heart is lost.
I pray every night to not make me that cold-blooded person for you as I am for the whole world around…coz only your words could keep me warm…coz only your eyes could make my eye blink…coz only you could make me and my heart weep…but things have changed…for good or for bad I don’t know…the only thing I know is that the little thing in my heart is lost!
6 comments:
That little thing was the you which has changed. It will give room to a different little thing, some other day
@WIL:
I am not open for any new thing now...the old one was enough to make me learn a lot of things!
Bt...maybe...someday...sometime!
I've been reading you since long. Seen the different phases you have been through and now I see you stumbling again.
Please don't give up hope. Stay strong. Every damn phase in life passes. This shall too. Do not give up.
We are watching your strength here. Don't disappoint us.
@Soumya:
Your comment was really motivating...thnxx a lott
Hey Mansi, people say, there is someone at the other end of the world who many feel exactly like you are feeling. Guess what, I am feeling the same like you felt. I could not have written this post any different.
Same situation with me, I tried but the boundries have been raised, my presence, now overshadowed by someone else's. At the end of the day I am still standing at the cross roads but this time I am alone.
Felt great reading your post. Bless you and please keep writing.
Regards.
@LT:
glad you liked it :)
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