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Saturday, March 5, 2011

Relationships and Me!



I have always faced disappointment and hurt in relationships. From the time I was a kid till today…relations have done nothing good to me. Not once! I have always valued relations more than anything in my life..friends, mentors, love , special someone. I have done more than required to keep them alive..loved them with all my heart, compromised lot many times to make them happy. And at the end what all I get in return is humiliation, backstabbing and lies. I have always trust people and they have always proved me wrong. People, whom I considered the best in my life, defamed my belief on them. Not a single relation in my life..not a single friend in my entire tenure ..turned out to be honest and faithful.

And today, if someone asks me with whom I am close or who holds a special place in my life…I say,’ No one! ‘. Yes..it’s no one today on whom I can rely. I don’t have faith left in my heart. I am tired of these lies. I am tired of broken trust and relationships. I cannot carry the burden of false relationships anymore. This has been so devastating an experience that today I cannot trust my own shadow. I think thousand times before taking a decision. I have lost faith in myself. I doubt every decision of mine. I doubt my ability to do anything. I just don’t want to talk with anyone now. I don’t want to know anyone. I want to get lost somewhere. I need silence. I don’t want to listen to my own heart and mind.

I am done with my share of relationships. No new relations now..no new friends..no old friends either! For now..all I need is complete silence. I want to live alone for a while. Or may be from now on, I want no one. I am over with the dose of sick sympathy and fake smiles.

True, relationships and I are not meant for each other!


... This pic has nothing to do with the post!



8 comments:

simply me said...

we all need a little time on our own..
but dont lock yourself out.
the world has good people too..learn from your mistakes and lock out the ones you cant trust, instead.

its the tough times (and times of betrayal) which teach us who our real friends are and make us aware of our strength.
dont run away from the test..face it..

take care!

Aashayein said...

@Simply:
I am done with exploring the world and "good" people!
Done with the tests of my strength!

Thnx for the words.!!
:-)

pIyUsH said...

wat wrds dear......simply out f d wrldd....
well done..

Aashayein said...

@Piyush:
:-)

Sarah malik said...

last year even i had similar feelings...but then time flew and things changed. and now m back to being me...although i still agree on the fact that being too Dependant on anyone is going to hurt u sooner or later but closing ourselves to new relations and people is bounding ourselves in a closet.
experiences after all help us grow and grow stronger and wiser :)
my take on relations : http://www.sarah-malik.in/2011/01/go-ahead-live-your-life.html


sarah

Aashayein said...

@subtlescribbler:

Agreed!
they do make us grow stronger and wiser!

Geet said...

u've written gr8.. as in the expression and all..
and congratulations yar.. for the editor's choice.. etc etc..
bt if u ask me.. m disappointed.. nd i am actualy..
i dun wanna spoil ur comment column wid my nagging.. all da best yar..
nd m sorry if i've hurt u by any chance or back stabbed u or lied to u anytym.. or anything.. m actually sorry.. just stay happy.. tht is all wich is imp. for me.. evn if m nt der..!!
tc

Aashayein said...

@Geet:

I can understand your disappointment. I won't say I haven't hurt anyone in my life..and happiness is not a word for me.
Rest all I can say is life doesn't come with warning message!